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bsolutely no chance of anything new or fresh being brought up for discussion in the annex。
still； all this might be bearable if only the grown…ups werent in the habit of repeating the stories we hear from mr。 kleiman； jan or miep； each time embellishing them with a few details of their own； so that i often have to pinch my arm under the table to keep myself from setting the enthusiastic storyteller on the right track。 little children； such as anne； must never； ever correct their elders； no matter how many blunders they make or how often they let their imaginations run away with them。
jan and mr。 kleiman love talking about people who have gone underground or into hiding； they know were eager to hear about others in our situation and that we truly sympathize with the sorrow of those whove been arrested as well as the joy of prisoners whove been freed。
going underground or into hiding has bee as routine as the proverbial pipe and slippers that used to await the man of the house after a long day at work。 there are many resistance groups； such as free netherlands； that forge identity cards； provide financial support to those in hiding； organize hiding places and find work for young christians who go underground。 its amazing how much these generous and unselfish
people do； risking their own lives to help and save others。
the best example of this is our own helpers； who have managed to pull us through so far and will hopefully bring us safely to shore； because otherwise theyll find themselves sharing the fate of those theyre trying to protect。 never have they uttered a single word about the burden we must be； never have they plained that were too much trouble。 they e upstairs every day and talk to the men about business and politics； to the women about food and wartime difficulties and to the children about books and newspapers。 they put on their most cheerful expressions； bring flowers and gifts for birthdays and holidays and are always ready to do what they can。
thats something we should never forget； while others display their heroism in battle or against the germans； our helpers prove theirs every day by their good spirits and affection。
the most bizarre stories are making the rounds； yet most of them are really true。 for instance； mr。 kleiman reported this week that a soccer match was held in the province of gelderland； one team consisted entirely of men who had gone underground； and the other of eleven military policemen。 in hilversum； new registration cards were issued。
in order for the many people in hiding to get their rations （you have to show this card to obtain your ration book or else pay 60 guilders a book）； the registrar asked all those hiding in that district to pick up their cards at a specified hour； when the documents could be collected at a separate table。
all the same； you have to be careful that stunts like these dont reach the ears of the germans。
yours； anne
sunday； january 30； 1944
my dearest kit； another sunday has rolled around； i dont mind them as much as i did in the beginning； but theyre boring enough。
i still havent gone to the warehouse yet； but maybe sometime soon。 last night i went downstairs in the dark； all by myself； after having been there with father a few nights before。 i stood at the top of the stairs while german planes flew back and forth； and i knew i was on my own； that i couldnt count on others for support。 my fear vanished。
i looked up at the sky and trusted in god。
i have an intense need to be alone。 father has noticed im not my usual self； but i cant tell him whats bothering me。 all i want to do is scream 〃let me be； leave me alone！鈥�
who knows； perhaps the day will e when im left alone more than id like！
anne frank
www銆偂 o m
FEBRUARY； 1944
灏彙ｈ銆倀！xt…澶╁爞
thursday； february 3； 1944
dearest kitty；
invasion fever is mounting daily throughout the country。 if you were here； im sure youd be as impressed as i am at the many preparations； though youd no doubt laugh at all the fuss were making。 who knows； it may all be for nothing！
the papers are full of invasion news and are driving everyone insane with such statements as： 〃in the event of a british landing in holland； the germans will do what they can to defend the country； even flooding it； if necessary。〃 theyve published maps of holland with the potential flood areas marked。 since large portions of amsterdam were shaded in； our first question was what we should do if the water in the streets rose to above our waists。 this tricky question elicited a variety of responses：
〃itll be impossible to walk or ride a bike； so well have to wade through the water。鈥�
〃dont be silly。 well have to try and swim。 well all put on our bathing suits and caps and swim underwater as much as we can； so nobody can see were jews。鈥�
〃oh； baloney！ i can just imagine the ladies swimming with the rats biting their legs！鈥�
（that was a man； of course； well see who screams loudest！）
〃we wont even be able to leave the house。 the warehouse is so unstable itll collapse if theres a flood。鈥�
〃listen； everyone； all joking aside； we really ought to try and get a boat。鈥�
〃why bother？ i have a better idea。 we can each take a packing crate from the attic and row with a wooden spoon。鈥�
〃im going to walk on stilts。 i used to be a whiz at it when i was young。〃
〃jan gies wont need to。 hell let his wife ride piggyback； and then miep will be on stilts。鈥�
so now you have a rough idea of whats going on； dont you； kit？ this lighthearted banter is all very amusing； but reality will prove otherwise。 the second question about the invasion was bound to arise： what should we do if the germans evacuate amsterdam？
〃leave the city along with the others。 disguise ourselves as well as we can。鈥�
〃whatever happens； dont go outside！ the best thing to do is to stay put！ the germans are capable of herding the entire population of holland into germany； where theyll all die。鈥�
〃of course well stay here。 this is the safest place。
well try to talk kleiman and his family into ing here to live with us。 well somehow get hold of a bag of wood shavings； so we can sleep on the floor。 lets ask miep and kleiman to bring some blankets； just in case。 and well order some extra cereal grains to supplement the sixty…five pounds we already have。 jan can try to find some more beans。 at the moment weve got about sixty…five pounds of beans and ten pounds of split peas。 and dont forget the fifty cans of vegetables。鈥�
〃what about the rest； mother？ give us the latest figures。 ； 〃ten cans of fish； forty cans of milk； twenty pounds of powdered milk； three bottles of oil； four crocks of butter； four jars of meat； two big jars of strawberries； two jars of raspberries； twenty jars of tomatoes； ten pounds of oatmeal； nine pounds of rice。
thats it。鈥�
our provisions are holding out fairly well。 all the same； we have to feed the office staff； which means dipping into our stock every week； so its not as much as it seems。
we have enough coal and firewood； candles too。
〃lets all make little moneybags to hide in our clothes so we can take our money with us if we need to leave here。鈥�
〃we can make lists of what to take first in case we have to run for it； and pack our knapsacks in advance。〃
〃when the time es； well put two people on the lookout； one in the loft at the front of the house and one in the back。鈥�
〃hey； whats the use of so much food if there isnt any water； gas or electricity？鈥�
〃well have to cook on the wood stove。 filter the water and boil it。 we should clean some big jugs and fill them with water。 we can also store water in the three kettles we use for canning； and in the washtub。鈥�
〃besides； we still have about two hundred and thirty pounds of winter potatoes in the spice storeroom。鈥�
all day long thats all i hear。 invasion； invasion； nothing but invasion。 arguments about going hungry； dying； bombs； fire extinguishers； sleeping bags； identity cards； poison gas； etc。； etc。 not exactly cheerful。
a good example of the explicit warnings of the male contingent is the following conversation with jan：
annex： 〃were afraid that when the germans retreat； theyll take the entire population with them。鈥�
jan： 〃thats impossible。 they havent got enough trains。鈥�
annex： 〃trains？ do you really think theyd put civilians on trains？ absolutely not。
everyone would have to hoof it。〃 （or； as dussel always says； per pedes apostolorum。）
jan： 〃i cant believe that。 youre always looking on the dark side。 what reason would they have to round up all the civilians and take them along？鈥�
annex： 〃dont you remember goebbels saying that if the germans have to go； theyll slam the doors to all the occupied territories behind them？鈥�
jan： 〃theyve said a lot of things。鈥�
annex： 〃do you think the germans are too noble or humane to do it？ their reasoning is： if we go under； well drag everyone else down with us。鈥�
jan： 〃you can say what you like； i just dont believe annex： 〃its always the same old story。 no one wants to see the danger until its
staring them in the face。鈥�
jan： 〃but you dont know anything for sure。 youre just making an assumption。鈥�
annex： 〃because weve already been through it all ourselves； first in germany and then here。 what do you thinks happening in russia？鈥�
jan： 〃you shouldnt include the jews。 i dont think anyone knows whats going on in russia。 the british and the russians are probably exaggerating for propaganda purposes； just like the germans。鈥�
annex： 〃absolutely not。 the bbc has always told the truth。 and even if the news is slightly exaggerated； the facts are bad enough as they are。 you cant deny that millions of peace…loving citizens in poland and russia have been murdered or gassed。鈥�
ill spare you the rest of our conversations。 im very calm and take no notice of all the fuss。 ive reached the point where i hardly care whether i live or die。 the world will keep on turning without me； and i cant do anything to change events anyway。 ill just let matters take their course and concentrate on studying and hope that everything will be all right in the end。
yours； anne
tuesday； february 8； 1944
dear kitty；
i cant tell you how i feel。 one minute im longing for peace and quiet； and the next for a little fun。 weve forgotten how to laugh i mean； laughing so hard you can t stop。
this morning i had 〃the giggles〃； you know； the kind we used to have at school。
margot and i were giggling like real teenagers。
last night there was another scene with mother。 margot was tucking her wool blanket around her when suddenly she leapt out of bed and carefully examined the blanket。
what do you think she found？ a pin！ mother had patched the blanket and forgotten to take it out。 father shook his head meaningfully and made a ment about how careless mother is。 soon afterward mother came in from the bathroom； and just to tease her i said； 〃du bist doch eine echte rabenmutter。〃 ＇oh； you are cruel。＇
of course； she asked me why id said that； and we told her about the pin shed overlooked。 she immediately assumed her haughtiest expression and said； 〃youre a fine one to talk。 when youre sewing； the entire floor is covered with pins。 and look； youve left the manicure set lying around again。 you never put that away either！鈥�
i said i hadnt used it； and margot backed me up； since she was the guilty party。
mother went on talking about how messy i was until i got fed up and said； rather curtly； 〃i wasnt even the one who said you were careless。 im always getting blamed for other peoples mistakes！鈥�
mother fell silent； and less than a minute later i was obliged to kiss her good…night。
this incident may not have been very important； but these days everything gets on my nerves。
anne mary frank
saturday； february 12； 1944
dearest kitty；
the sun is shining； the sky is deep blue； theres a magnificent breeze； and im longing really longing for everything： conversation； freedom； friends； being alone。 i long。 。 。 to cry！ i feel as if i were about to explode。 i know crying would help； but i cant cry。 im restless。 i walk from one room to another； breathe through the crack in the window frame； feel my heart beating as if to say； 〃fu