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moment。
It rang twice before I heard a high…pitched； pinched woman’s voice
answer。
“Hello。 You’ve reached PS 277 and this is Mrs。 Whitmore speaking。
How may I help you？”
“Is Alex Fineman there？”
“And who may I ask is calling？”
“This is Andrea Sachs； Alex’s girlfriend。”
“Ah； yes； Andrea！ We’ve all heard so much about you。” Her words were
so clipped she sounded as though she might choke any moment。
“Oh； really？ That’s 。 。 。 uh； that’s good。 I’ve heard a lot about
you too； of course。 Alex says wonderful things about everyone at
school。”
“Well； isn’t that nice。 But seriously； Andrea； it sounds like you
have quite some job there！ How interesting it must be； working for
such a talented woman。 You’re a lucky girl； indeed。”
Ah； yes。 Mrs。 Whitmore。 I am a lucky girlindeed。I’m so lucky； you
have no idea。 I can’t tell you how lucky I felt when I was sent out
just yesterday afternoon to purchase tampons for my boss； only to be
told that I’d bought the wrong ones and asked why I do nothing
right。 And luck is probably the only way to explain why I get to
sort another person’s sweat… and food…stained clothing each morning
before eight and arrange to have it cleaned。 Oh； wait！ I think what
actually makes me luckiest of all is getting to talk to breeders all
over the tristate area for three straight weeks in search of the
perfect French bulldog puppy so two incredibly spoiled and
unfriendly little girls can each have their own pet。 Yes； that’s it！
“Oh； yes； well； it is a fantastic opportunity；” I said by rote。 “A
job a million girls would die for。”
“You can say that again； dear！ And guess what？ Alex just walked in。
I’ll put him on。”
“Hey； Andy； what’s going on？ How’s your day going？”
“Don’t ask。 I’m on my way to pick up Her lunch right now。 How’s your
day？”
“Good； so far。 My class has music today right after lunch； so I
actually have an hour and a half free； which is nice。 And then we
get to cover more phonics exercises！” he said； sounding just a
little defeated。 “Even though it seems like they’re never going to
learn how to actually read something。”
“Well； have there been any slashings today？”
“No。”
“So； how much can you ask for？ You’ve had a relatively pain…free；
bloodless day。 Enjoy it。 Save the whole reading concept for
tomorrow。 So； guess what？ Lily called this morning。 She finally got
evicted from her place in Harlem； so we’re going to move in
together。 Fun； right？”
“Hey； congratulations！ Couldn’t have been better timing for you。 You
guys will have a great time together。 e to think of it； it’s a
little scary。 Dealing with Lily full…time 。 。 。 and Lily’s guys 。 。
。 Promise we can stay at my place a lot？”
“Of course。 But you’ll feel right at Home—it’ll be just like senior
year all over again。”
“Too bad she’s losing that cheap apartment。 Other than that； it’s
great news。”
“Yeah； I’m psyched。 Shanti and Kendra are fine； but I’m kind of done
with the whole living…with…strangers thing。” I loved Indian food；
but I did not love how the curry smell had seeped into everything I
owned。 “I’m going to see if Lil wants to meet for a drink tonight to
celebrate。 You up for it？ We’ll meet somewhere in the East Village
so it’s not too far for you。”
“Yeah； sure； sounds great。 I’m running to Larchmont to watch Joey
tonight； but I’ll be back in the city by eight。 You won’t even be
out of work by then； so I’ll meet Max and we can all meet up
afterward。 Hey； is Lily seeing anyone？ Max could use a； well 。 。 。”
“A what？” I laughed。 “Go on； say it。 Do you think my friend is a
whore？ She’s just free…spirited； is all。 And is she seeing someone？
What kind of question is that？ Someone named Pink…Shirt Boy stayed
over there last night。 I don’t think I know his real name。”
“Whatever。 Anyway； the bell just rang。 Call me when you’re done
dropping off the Book。”
“Will do。 ’Bye。”
I was about to stash the phone when it rang again。 The number wasn’t
familiar； though； and I answered it out of sheer relief that it
wasn’t Miranda or Emily。
“Mir—er； hello？” I’d taken to automatically answering my cell and
Home phone “Miranda Priestly’s office；” which was supremely
embarrassing when it was anyone except my parents or Lily。 Had to
work on that。
“Is this the lovely Andrea Sachs whom I inadvertently terrified at
Marshall’s party？” asked a somewhat hoarse and very sexy voice on
the other end。 Christian！ I’d been almost relieved when he hadn’t
resurfaced anywhere after massaging my hand with his lips。 But all
the feelings of wanting to impress him with my wit and charm that
first night came rushing back； and I quickly vowed to play it cool。
“It is。 And who may I ask is this？ There were a number of men who
terrified me that night for dozens of different and varied
reasons。”OK； so far； so good。 Deep breath； be cool。
“I didn’t realize I had so much petition；” he said smoothly。 “But
I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised。 How have you been； Andrea？”
“Fine。 Great； actually；” I lied quickly； remembering aCosmo article
I’d read that had exhorted me to “keep it light and airy and happy”
when talking to a new guy because most “normal” guys didn’t respond
so well to hard…bitten cynicism。 “Work is going really well。 I’m
loving my job； actually！ It’s been really interesting lately—a lot
to learn； tons of stuff going on。 Yeah； it’s great。 What about
you？”Don’t talk about yourself too much； don’t dominate the
conversation； get him fortable enough to chat about his favorite
and most familiar topic： him 。
“You’re a rather deft liar； Andrea。 To an untrained ear that almost
sounded believable； but you know what they say； don’t you？ You can’t
bullshit a bullshitter。 Don’t worry； though。 I’ll let you get away
with it this time。” I opened my mouth to deny the accusation； but
instead I just laughed。 A perceptive one indeed。 “Let me get right
to the point here； because I’m about to get on a plane for D。C。 and
security doesn’t look all too happy that I’m walking through a metal
detector while talking on the phone。 Do you have plans for Saturday
night？”
I hated when people phrased their questions that way； asked if you
had plans before they told you what they had in mind。 Did his
girfriend need someone to run errands for her and he thought I fit
the bill？ Or maybe he needed someone to walk his dog while he gave
yet another eight…hour…long interview to theNew York Times ？ I was
considering what nonmittal way I could answer that question when
he said； “So； I have a reservation at Babbo this Saturday。 Nine
o’clock。 A bunch of friends will be there； too； mostly magazine
editors and pretty interesting people。 An editor fromThe Buzz； and a
couple writers fromThe New Yorker 。 Good crowd。 You up for it？” At
that exact moment； an ambulance roared past me with its siren
wailing； lights flashing in a fruitless attempt to speed through the
hopelessly gridlocked traffic。 As usual； the drivers ignored the
ambulance and it sat at the red light like all the other vehicles。
Had he just asked me out？ Yes； I thought that’s exactly what had
just happened。 He was asking me out！ He was asking me out。 Christian
Collinsworth was asking me on a date—a Saturday…night date； to be
specific； and to Babbo； where he just so happened to have a
prime…time reservation with a group of smart； interesting people；
people just like him。 Never even mind theNew Yorkerwriters！ I racked
my brain； trying to remember if I’d mentioned to him at the party
that Babbo was the one restaurant I most wanted to try in New York；
that I loved Italian and knew how much Miranda loved it and I was
dying to go。 I’d even thought about blowing a week’s pay on a meal
and had called to make a reservation for Alex and me； but they’d
been booked solid for the next five months。 I hadn’t been asked on a
date by anyone other than Alex in three years。
“Um； Christian； golly； I’d love to；” I started； trying to forget
immediately that I’d just said “golly。”Golly！ Who said that？ The
scene where Baby proudly announces to Johnny that she’d carried a
watermelon flashed to mind； but I pushed it back and willed myself
to forge forward despite the humiliation。 “I’d really love to”—yes；
you idiot； you just said that； try to make some progress here—“but I
just can’t do it。 I； um； I already have plans for Saturday。” A good
response overall； I thought。 I was shouting over the noise of the
siren； but I thought I still sounded somewhat dignified。 No need to
be available for a date that was only two days away； and no real
need to reveal existence of boyfriend 。 。 。 after all； it really
wasn’t any of his Business。 Right？
“Do you really have plans； Andrea； or do you think your boyfriend
would disapprove of you going out with another man？” He was Fishing；
I could tell。
“Either way has nothing to do with you；” I said prissily； and I
actually rolled my eyes at myself。 I crossed Third Avenue without
noticing that the light was against me and almost got mowed down by
a minivan。
“OK； well； I’ll let you off this time。 But I’ll be asking again。 And
I think next time you’ll say yes。”
“Oh； really？ What gives you that impression？” The confidence that
had seemed so sexy before was now starting to sound a whole lot like
arrogance。 The only problem was that it made him sound even sexier。
“Just a hunch； Andrea； just a hunch。 And no need to worry that
pretty little head of yours—or your boyfriend’s—I was just extending
a friendly invitation for a good meal and good pany。 Maybe he’d
like to join us； Andrea？ Your boyfriend。 He must be a great guy； I’d
really like to meet him。”
“No！” I almost shouted； horrified at the thought of the two of them
sitting across a table from each other； each so amazing in such
radically different ways。 I’d be ashamed for Christian to see Alex’s
wholesomeness； his do…gooder ways。 To Christian； Alex would seem
like a naï；ve hick。 And I’d be even more ashamed for Alex to see；
with his own eyes； all the ugly things I found so incredibly
attractive about Christian： the style； the cockiness； a
self…assuredness so rock…solid it seemed impossible to insult him。
“No。” I laughed or； rather； forced a laugh； as I tried to make it
sound casual。 “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea。 Although I’m sure
he’d just love to meet you； too。”
He laughed with me； but it had turned mocking； patronizing。 “I was
just kidding； Andrea。 I’m sure your boyfriend’s a really great guy；
but I’m not particularly interested in meeting him。”
“Well； of course。 Sure。 I mean； I knew what you—”
“Listen； I’ve got to run。 Why don’t you give me a call if you change
your mind 。 。 。 or your ‘plans；’ OK？ Offer’s still open。 Oh； and
have a great day。” And before I could say another word； he’d hung
up。
What the hell had just happened？ I ran through it again： Hot Smart
Writer had somehow found my cell number； called it； and fully asked
me on a date for Saturday night to Hot Trendy Restaurant。 I wasn’t
clear whether he knew ahead of time if I had a boyfriend or not； but
he didn’t appear particularly daunted by the information。 The only
thing I knew for sure was that I’d spent way too long c